Should I…

Do you sometimes think of me
Or only when you need something
Someone to satisfy your needs
I often wish it wasn’t me
That you picked out of the crowd
After I shamelessly offered myself
To you, to us
For lust
But never for love
I think I wanted to cross that line with you
For me, myself
For love
And never for lust
But I was never good enough
You wanted more
Different women
Different days
Every fucking day
Should I stay
Or should I go…

Tossing and Turning

Is it you inside my head
Tossing and turning
Messing things up
Having fun now aren’t we
I wish you’d leave
Overstaying your welcome
Is it me losing it slowly
Tossing and turning
In this bed i’ve made
In this bed you once lay
I wish you’d have stayed
You’re still welcome here
Is it us making things complicated
Tossing and turning
Beating around the bush
Avoiding all our demons
The elephant in the room
They’re not welcome here anymore

A Tale of Lost Friendships

You thought you could change me
Tame me, just a little maybe
You thought you could be the one for me
But that’s what he thought too, so convincingly

Yes, I held your hands in mine
Told you sweet little lies
Even kissed your lips, looked you lovingly in the eyes
All lies, lies, lies, messed up lies…

Lies I told myself a hundred times
Convinced myself we could share a life
But it somehow didn’t feel allright
Now you hate me and I tell myself it’s fine

I said I was sorry, while you felt sorry for me
Now I can’t look you in the eyes normally
Without feeling judged, without feeling ever so guilty
But in all honesty, I feel nothing inside of me

I’ve lost you and everyone seems to pick your side
They seem to love you even more, why
I guess these friends were never mine
So this is goodbye, for good this time