Happy New Year

As I sit here on this cold December night
Right next to the fire light
Alone under the neon light
I see your smile

Content as I’ll ever be
Determined to live my life
Minus the misery
Minus the old childish me

As I peer into the dark skies
I can see all the stars shine
Maybe I’ll get to make a wish tonight
Maybe something will come true tonight

I feel happy the way I am
I realize I don’t wish to go back
Back to the old days, the old ways
Back to just being okay

I’ll be better, more than okay
I won’t live for another yesterday
I’ll be great, I’ll shine
Like the brightest star in the night

Will you shine together with me

Happy new year

 

Voicemail

I shouldn’t have called you
Demanding to see you
Telling you I miss you
While she was loving you
So intensively
So passionately
Slowly erasing me
I want you to be happy
But why can’t you be happy with me
I’ve made a stupid mistake
Can’t take back those days
Missing you has made me this way
I needed to hear you
Say that you still want me
Tell me you still need me
Let me know you still love me
That you’ll forgive me
But alas
All I got is your voicemail
And somehow I hope
Wish, and I pray
You’ll never get this message

 

Can You Sleep At Night

Can you sleep at night
With a truck load of lies
Right by your side
And in your sick mind

Can you sleep at night
All by yourself
No one to hold tight
No tears left to cry

Can you sleep at night
Holding on to dear life
Holding on to your morality
Holding on to the old me

Can you sleep at night
Wishing you could turn back time
You and I, without the lies
Free of denials

Can you sleep at night
Thinking I might die
So your secrets will be safe
Buried together in my grave

Can you sleep at night

 

I Can Pretend

I can pretend everything is fine
That yesterday was just a dream of mine
I can pretend your heart ain’t mine
Simply because you took it back, just like that

I can pretend we never happened
All your deceiving and backstabbing
I can pretend I don’t care
Simply because you were never there

I can pretend I don’t know you
Because I never really did
I can pretend I have moved on already
Simply because I should be

 

Your Photograph

I saw a photo of you today
You look like the day we first met
Like it was yesterday
I was rather occupied
You just wanted to know my name
I never cared for yours
But you stuck around anyway
Just in case I’d change my mind
Somehow I did
Maybe because you were cute
Or maybe it was just the booze
But I knew I wanted to get to know you
See past the name
Past the pretty face
It took me a while
For me to see past the photograph
I know why I do not wish to go back
To those happy days
Our happy ways
You holding back
Me being in doubt
Tired of leading
Tired of speaking
Tired of believing
Now I’m just tired
Of looking at your photograph

 

Bottle of Tequila

A bottle of tequila
To drown away the misery
Another whiskey on the rocks
To make me sleep better at night
Another stranger by my side
If I can’t have you
The next best thing will do
The day after always hurts the most
The memories come back
One by one
Wish I could leave it at that
But too bad
You’re messing with my head
Still sleeping in my bed somehow
But it’s not you
Not you at all
Just another reflection
Ghost from the past
So I’ll open up another bottle
This calls for a celebration
Thank you for sticking around
Like you promised you would
Guess this is forever after
You and me
Right here in my memories

 

This is it

Sitting by the phone
Hoping, wishing, dreaming
You’d be erased from my memory
Or at least from my directory
This can’t be good
Cause you’re bad for me
Now praying, thinking, saying
This will be the last day
I get to be so worked up over you
And your accusations
Your childishness
My foolishness
Me feeling guilty
For something you have done
Something I could never do
Guess the blame is really on me
For letting this happen
So…
This is it then

 

Lies

Lie to me
Do it so convincingly
Smother me
Your manipulating capacity
Is killing me
Leave me alone please
But wait for me
Addicted to this scenery
Of you and me
Lies, all lies standing in between
Will I ever be freed
From this fantasy